Husband and Wife SMS, Text Messages

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After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband,
You know, I was a fool when I married you.
The husband replied, “Yes dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice”.

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70 year old man asked his wife.
Do you feel sad when u see me running behind young girls?
Wife: No not at all, even dogs chase cars but they can’t drive it.

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Man 1- I Notice that Ur Wife Is Mostly In The Kitchen
Probably She Loves Cooking Many Varieties
Man 2- No! Actually Our Telephone Connection Is In The Kitchen.

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Wife- Beggar Who Came Yesterday Is Very Bad
Husband- Ya ?
Wife- I Gave Him Food Yesterday & Today He Gifted Me A Book How To Cook?

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A fact about women:
They can see a hair of a girl on their husband’s coat from 20 meters away, but they can’t see a pillar from two meters while parking a car..

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Man : My wife is too good. She can talk on any subject for hours.
Friend : Ahh!!! my wife is better, she does not even need a subject to talk about!

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Wife: Yesterday-night I saw a dream That u were sending me
Jewelery and clothes!
Husband: yeah, I saw your dad paying the bill !!!

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A Sad girl was sitting with her husband
Husband: U r d second most beautiful girl, I’ve ever seen.
Girl: Who’s the first?
Husband: It’s YOU When u smile.

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Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Darling : When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Darling : Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, “What other problem Can there be greater than this one?

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Oneliner:
+ When I Met My Wife
I Knew She Was ‘Miss Right.!’
I Didn’t Know That Her
First Name Was
‘Always’ 🙂

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I m feeling happy, do u know why?
B’coz I am so lucky, do u know how?
B’coz God loves me, do u know how?
B’coz he gave me a gift, do u know what?
Its YOU my love.

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Love Is The Thing That …
Enables A Woman To Sing
While She Mops Up The Floor
After
Her Husband Has Walked Across It
In His Barn Boots … =P ;->

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Judge: why did u shoot Ur wife
instead of shooting her lover?
Man: Your honor,
it’s easier to shoot a woman once,
than shooting one man every week.

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HUSBAND and WIFE are like 2 tyres of a vehicle
If 1 punctures, the vehicle can’t move further
Moral:always Keep a SPARE TYRE….

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2 Married Men Talking-
10yrs Ago,
Whenever I Returned Home,
My Dog Used To Greet Me By Barking & My Wife By Kissing.
Now They Both Exactly Do The Opposite